Clever witticisms to say at virtual parties?

• Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
• Spotted on the back of a t-shirt worn by LAPD Bomb Squad: “If you see me running, try to keep up.”
• Don’t you think it’s unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
• You have the right to remain silent; anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
• A closed mouth gathers no feet.
• The grass may actually be greener on the other side of the fence, but it still has to be mowed.
• A wizard worked in a modern factory. Everything was satisfactory except that certain miscreants, taking advantage of his good nature, would steal his parking spot. This continued until he put up the following effective sign: This Parking Space Belongs To The Wizard. Violators Will Be Toad. 😅